I don't edit

It's true.  When I sit down and write something I write something and then I ignore it forever.  I tend to not edit things as I write (it's a problem for certain).  I always felt that editing was second guessing myself, and that was never something that I tended to do.  I need to work on going back and re-reading things for content and continuity.  While grammar and the like are important enough, I contend that as long as the crux of the story gets across you can still enjoy the reading experience... of course I say that knowing I have a fairly horrible grammatical voice and should probably go back and reacquaint myself with the English language...

I wrote a short story a bit earlier inspired by a conversation that I had while I was in California (the ending is not part of the conversation!) and I've been trying to keep with my goal (granted you don't see all that I am writing, just occasional things I throw out there when I am bored).

Maybe one day I'll go back to my old format and complain about something other than myself and my grammatical foibles, but today this is what you get... enjoy.

The Restaurant.

               “I can’t believe the day is finally here” I said aloud.  The bathroom lights illuminating my tie as I set to straighten it in the mirror, my wife only a few feet away getting ready.  Her dress shimmered in the lights of the bathroom, a calming yet exciting light blue, a favorite of mine.  She walks up to me to give me a peck on the cheek…

               “I know.  We’ve had these reservations for almost a year now!”

               “Such an intriguing concept.  A restaurant where you can’t see the food, or the people you are eating with.” I say.

               “It’s the perfect concept for you.  You get to be social without actually having to interact with anyone else in any way, shape or form” she intoned sarcastically.

               “I know!”

               We couldn’t believe when we had read about this restaurant.  A place where you walk in, get seated at your table and then blindfolded, we instantly were intrigued by the concept and found out about reservations.  Somehow we got lucky and were able to score reservations for opening night.  That’s right this place has had buzz surrounding it for at least a year now and here we are, finally at opening night.

               I don’t often get excited about new things, or going out in a suit for that matter (I’d much rather be on the couch in pajamas with some take-out and DVR’d shows… I have a huge backlog of television that I need to watch), but this spoke to me.  The concept of eating without seeing the food, removing a sense from the act of eating and enjoying food in a different fashion compelled me to do this.

               “You ready?” I inquire.

               “Yeah, let’s go”.

               An uneventful car ride later and we roll up in front of the restaurant.  The restaurant was unnamed (part of the appeal) and was located in an up and coming part of the city, a converted warehouse district that was now full of condos and people with more money than sense.    A sharply dressed valet was there to take our keys (and our car) and we were escorted into the restaurant. 

               “Welcome to our experiment in eating” the hostess said, “Names please?”

               We give our names and the Hostess verifies the names on her list, scratches both of our names off and then directs us into the main eating area.

               The restaurant was really two rooms.  The first room was the waiting room where the Hostess greeted us, it was unassuming and basically a small, black box.  No art on the walls, no signage anywhere, no names.  The other room of the restaurant was similar just a larger room.  In the middle of the room was a circular table, big enough to seat 12 people.  Once again, no signage, no artwork, nothing on the walls.  A single dimmed light hung above the table.

               “Please be seated.  As you can tell we are waiting just a few more people to come.  As part of the experience please refrain from interacting with any of the other guests”.

               We take our seats next to another excited couple.  We can tell that they are having the hardest time not trying to strike up a conversation with us about the shared experience we are about to have.  Luckily for all of us we don’t wait long on the other group to arrive for our meal to begin.  As the other group arrives a gentlemen in a tuxedo comes out and introduces us to the restaurant.

               “Ladies and Gentlemen, tonight we begin our experiment in eating.  In a few minutes you will be blindfolded and the lights will be turned off.  We ask that you do not speak with the people next to you.  Do not let their opinions on the food and spoil your own thoughts.  This is an experiment that each of you will undertake by yourselves.  The last thing, all of the foods will be enjoyed solely with your senses, there is no silverware in front of you.  All foods will be enjoyed using three of your senses.  Touch.  Smell.  And Taste.”  As the man in the tuxedo was saying this a group of twelve people dressed in all black showed up and walked behind each and every one of us in the room.  “The people behind you will serve as your napkin.  Since you will unable to see any of the food, or what may or may not be on your fingers, they will make sure that after each course you are clean and ready for the next course.  They will also help you with your blindfold.  I welcome all of you to the culinary experience of a lifetime.  Please enjoy”.  He bows and quietly leaves the room.

               The person behind me then takes the blindfold and places it over my eyes.  The world goes dark.  Almost immediately I can hear plates and platters being fumbled into the room.  The noise of the preparation makes me hunger with anticipation.  A disembodied voice in heard “Course One”.

               The person behind me takes me by the arm and leads my hands towards whatever the first course is.  It’s odd.  It’s spherical and has a sticky viscous fluid around it.  It’s warm to the touch, but not hot.  “Please eat” the same disembodied voice said.  I place the object in my mouth and take a bite.  The taste is wonderful, a variety of flavors and textures wrapped into one.  The object was soft on the outside, had a hard shell in the middle and liquid inside of that.  Complex at all aspects of the food.  It was delightful and unsettling at the same time, not knowing what it is.  After I had eaten the person behind me took my hand and placed it in what I can only assume was a bowl of water and washed off my hands.

               “Course Two…”

               The same things occurs, the person behind me takes my arm and leads me to the food.  I grab it and feel the texture.  This was flat and crispy.  Much hotter than the last.  Still the flavor was amazing.

               The meal went on like this for what seemed like hours.

               “Course Three”

               Spongy and coated in some type of sauce.

               “Course Five”

               Stringy and tough.  Tasted similar to beef jerky.

               “Course Eight”

               Soft and fatty.

               “The Final Course”

               I guess dessert, but I am not sure.  It’s sweet.  It almost seems like an attempt at caramelized meat.  I’m not really sure.  It’s good though, albeit it seems over cooked.

               “Thank you for taking part in our experiment.  You all have been most kind to help us out today.  You may please take off your blindfolds.”

               The lights were put back on and we began to take off our blindfolds.  We could not believe our eyes.  Most people in the room broke down in tears and began to dry heave and some even threw up.

               I stand up quickly and grab a napkin from the person behind me.

               “Overcooked” I say as I wipe my face down and walk away.

               On the table was the bloodied and lifeless corpse of some random person I have never seen.